Why should I be grateful when things aren’t going to suit me?
As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them. (Luke 7:38)
There is a picture of a grateful person. She is worshiping, humble, thankful, fully yielded to the Master.
Want to see a photo of an ungrateful individual? Find any reference to a Pharisee, and you have it. For example:
The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ (Luke 18:11-12)
Without knowing any more, you find your spirit recoiling from this guy. He’s proud of his righteousness and will be harsh and judgmental toward anyone less committed. He addresses God as an equal. He is unteachable, unleadable, incorrigible.
Pity the pastor with Pharisaical leaders. They are ungrateful, self-righteous, demanding, and a pain to live with.
The Ungrateful Person in Any Church is a Problem
He/she is focused on the negative and feels entitled to:
Criticize: they are quick to point out the shortcomings of the leadership (pastors, teachers, worship leaders). One pastor friend had a member who sent him a full three-page letter every Monday detailing the faults of his Sunday sermon and making suggestions on how to improve it.
Gripe: I expected more, I deserve more. As hard as it is to believe, there actually are people in some churches who feel their spiritual gift is pointing out the shortcomings of others.
Not participate: Why should I? I get nothing from it. They judge everything by that standard: “What will I get out of it?” The selfishness is mind-boggling.
Spread unhappiness among others: Negativism is as contagious as any flu virus ever.
Resist any encouragement from the pastor to change: Because this individual sees himself/herself as the standard for others, they have no further use for lessons to be learned, studies to be taken up.
The Main Problem with the Chronically Ungrateful in the Church
Such an individual probably is not saved. They give every evidence of being lost. Spiritually blind. Someone who has never met Jesus Christ. Obviously, such a statement needs clarifying.
The negative, never-happy, always complaining member has clearly never been to the cross. Has never had his/her sins forgiven. Has never seen himself/herself as a sinner in dire need of mercy and then experienced the joy of receiving that mercy as a free gift.
The flush of first-joy that floods the soul when you realize “I once was lost, but now am found; was blind but now I see” changes everything. The newborn child of God is like the man previously known as the Gadarene demoniac of Mark 5. After the Lord saves him, we get two glimpses of him:
In Mark 5:15, people were fascinated to see the formerly crazy man now fully-clothed, seated near Jesus, and in his right mind.
In Mark 5:18, when Jesus got into the boat to leave, we read that “he who had been demon-possessed begged Him that he might be with Him.” Jesus told him to return home and “tell them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He has had compassion on you” (Mark 5:19)
Question: Does anyone think that when that guy returned home, he began to boast of his righteousness and scoff at the sinners among him? He would not have! He would have been humble and grateful, teachable and sweet-spirited. The kind of guy every pastor (and every member) wants in church.
The kind of person I want to be.